In Focus

Weddings, I love weddings. Less the Ang Bao would be ideal, other than that, well, it's a joyous occassion.

Was helping my good friend planning his wedding since January. The nice thing about this particular wedding was that the bride and groom are my friends. I know each of them personally. Grew up in church, well, for almost ten years now.

Of course, the credits do not go to me alone. There's many others involved, there's the gate crasher team, the church wedding and dinner. I was more obvious for the dinner.

The thing about planning for a wedding is... it is exactly the same planning for any other events, be it commercial or not. There bound to be unhappy moments involved and also misunderstandings. The fact that it's a wedding makes it a little easier to control I suppose. Just look at the bride n groom, thankfully they are not the nonchalant type. Believe me, there are those who do not want to lay a hand nor make major decisions.

It's usually the friends or relatives, in this case, friends, that actually strained a little of their friendship. People making the decisions, the planning team, tends to want their decision to be kept and respect by everyone else. Which means, a friendly suggestion will often than not, be looked upon as a destroyer to the perfect plan. I always wonder why people find it hard to give a little attention to suggestions. Afterall, it's only a 'SUGGESTION'. You are not oblige to adopt them, perhaps to consider it???

That's where the value of friendships comes in. Insist your way or looking at the goals to achieved? Lame suggestions are not part of the topic here (that of course, should get rebuked and perhaps thrown tomatoes). The aim is to make the wedding day smooth and memorable for the couple.

For a while, I actually want to show attitude when my suggestions was brushed off. Trust me, it was for the precaution, and that was actually from the initial plan but was later changed which I do not know how it got there. I took a step back, look at the overall picture for a while. Here are my two good friends, who were by my side in my deepest and darkest period, they are committing to a union which then I had doubts about it. And in light, I am very happy for them, minus the tears. I then realised that all I wanted was to be a part of the contributors to make that day a success.

I opened my heart, take no offences at whoever brushes me off, telling me my ideas was crappy or putting me down. On the actual day, though I did made certain suggestions but was told otherwise of the plan, I kept mum and follow through. Little 'respect' was given but what the hack, I still kept mum and follow through. Doesn't help to make a fuss nor to argue. The most important thing was to make the groom n bride happy, everyone happy. I realised that the goal, does acutally keeps one alive and focus.

I could have done lotsa nasty things or utter nasty words, but it doesn't provide help to the wedding. I did not take anyone's comments to heart for I focus on making the couple happy and stress-free.

Someone poked at me from that morning till nite. I'm oblivious to the fact that why the person did what was done, but I supposed I wasn't really 'hurt' by that person's behaviour towards me. One point in time, I felt like steaming up. I mean... how does it feel to have a person poking at you for the whole day? Think about it... but the fact that my goals for the day was the couple, so I 'rebuked' that person with a friendly smile yet sending the message through that the nonsense had to stop. I turned away with a smile and walked off.

I believed everyone present at that point of time was able to read from my face and understood my words. If they don't, which is even better, it's alright either.

So... in whatever was done, especially for a friend, if not like mine, for two friends, keep focus on the love for the friends and try not to steer away from it. Eventually, if things get personal, it will cause a strain on friendship, which I value very much in my heart.

You can hate me, detest me or even best, get angry at me, I LOVE you still. Each and everyone of you with every single bit of my love. I poured it all out and am still pouring on to you.

Well, as usual, here are the highlights of the wedding:










the Gate Crashers &
the Gate Keeper

The Hakka Clan

The Gate Crashers

me with the couple, Keith & Peiyu

Together, we shall walk hand-in-hand